Nothing more than feelings

Appalling amount of time since I blogged last. Anyhoo. I've had a slightly quirky thing going on in my head lately. It's this underlying feeling that something really bad will happen in a dramatic fashion at any moment. I feel sometimes like I will get into a car crash (or even get hit by a car when I'm walking on the sidewalk!) I've been in enough car accidents to know that paranoid feeling shortly after being in an accident, but I have never really had this paranoia spontaneously before. Of course, the worst scenario is that something bad will happen to C. Those thoughts cross my mind much more often than I'd like. Here's the thing: I'm not much of a worrywart in general. I never have been. So, I find this kind of thinking out of character for me. When I try to do some self-diagnosis with my advanced degree in bullshit psychiatry, I arrive at a few possible causes: *There is some after-effect of the chordoma experience that is causing me to have some (mostly) irrational fears? *I am a mom now, and that just makes you crazy. *This winter has put my thoughts in a dark place. Or some combination of these three? Maybe this is quite common? I don't know. I have to say, it makes my intention to manifest only positive stuff somewhat challenging, but I'm trying.